A New Year

It is now a new year. Is it better than last year! It is in some ways. Some ways it isn't, some now. I'm still very much estranged from my mother. She hasn't called me since my birthday when she told me I was going to hell.

So I had the usual Christmas. It's such a bad time of year for me. I always have high expectations, and this year was no exception. I really tried this year to enjoy the music and all the festivities. I did notice that the radio stations didn't play as many Christmas songs as they usually do. Hmmm!  But it always seems hard when people ask what you are doing for Christmas and we have no tradition, our family is dwindling from estrangement and our dysfunctional families. After the death of my husband's mother it kind of broke the family apart. Nobody has kept in touch. Odd.

I always vow to make the next year better, but I realized that nothing much has changed. Though a lot has changed. I've become a little less fearful of the future. I've learned to take one day at a time, though it takes a lot of effort and a lot of prayer. I still have my fear of doctors, but not as much.

So Happy 2011 and all the best.

Josie